Count the Beats

I got in the car today to go to my internship and Ke$ha's "We R Who We R" was on the radio. It made me half smile, given the condition of the roads today. That was the song that was blaring through my speakers when I spun out on I-15 right by the Port of Entry on my way back to school during my freshman year. It was snowing that day and the roads were slick. I wasn't going very fast, but I tried to slow down so I didn't run into the car in front of me. Something happened and I did a complete slow-mo 360 on the freeway, right at the mouth of the on-ramp where the trucks were pulling onto the road. It was most terrifying thing that has every happened to me. Every time I hear that song, it reminds me of it.

Some people associate memories with smells. For me, majority of mine are tied to songs. College is no exception. I've discovered more songs and bands during the last three and a half years than I can count. Part of it is because I finally had a computer that I could spend endless hours on Youtube with. Another part of it is my social media use. I find so many songs on Twitter and Tumblr. I've been feeling very nostalgic lately, probably because I'm graduating in a few days, so I put together a college playlist. Enjoy!

Freshman Year:
Katy Perry's entire Teenage Dream album. I discovered this that year. Still a solid album almost 4 years later. "Not Like the Movies" still stands out as the song that helped me find the answer I needed. I bawled all the way through the canyon that day.

Katy Perry "In Between" This one is all about a boy. The relationship didn't work out, but I did learn a lot about myself. I think I cried the first time I heard this song because it was so pertinent to my situation.

Ferras "Something About You" Fall, watching the leaves change.

Bat For Lashes "Daniel". This is wintertime for me. Sitting in the Hub staring out the windows and watching everyone pass when I should have been working on homework.

Temper Trap "Sweet Disposition" Attempting to sunbathe on the grass with Esther and Mabel the very first warm day of Spring.

Phoenix "Listomania" Finals week. My roommate Esther and I played smash ball in our tiny hallway while listening to this. We lost the ball outside one day, so we tried to play with pine cones. It didn't work well.

Sophomore Year

Katy Perry "The One That Got Away" This song just feels like fall. I made my roommates watch Ellen with me the day the video premiered.

Katy Perry "Part of Me" The Grammy's. Made my roommates watch those too. 

Goyte "Eyes Wide Open" Spring. Studying in the library.

M83 "Midnight City" I heard this song the very first time I ever watched Coachella (on Youtube of course. I don't have that much money.) 

Junior Year

Taylor Swift "I Almost Do." Rainy day walking on campus thinking about calling someone I wanted to talk to. I didn't.

John Mayer "Edge of Desire" "Not Myself" I was walking home from work late one night and I looked up. The sky was super dark, but there were stars. It was gorgeous and I felt so small. Sometimes you just need those moments.

Angus and Julia Stone "Big Jet Plane" I got sick and I remember listening to this over and over in my pain killer dazed state. It was so sad.

Parachute "White Dress" They played the End of Year Bash. My three best friends came up and went to the concert with me. It was one of the best nights. 

Senior Semester

Panic at the Disco "Collar Full" Infatuation is always fun...until it ends.

Katy Perry "Roar" When the Homecoming Dance sucks, you have a dance party in your living room instead.

The Joy Formidable "The Leopard and the Lung" This is going to be the graduation song, I think. I found it last week and I can't stop listening to it. It's just one of those songs where it starts and you get the best kind of lost for a few minutes.

I'm sure there are tons more, I just can't think of them right now. Only 2 more days until I'm done! Am I ready for this?

2 Weeks and Counting

My inner journalist is cringing a little at that title. I had a professor my sophomore year that drilled into our heads that we were NEVER to use a number at the start of a sentence. But there really isn't another way to say it, so I'll just have to tune him out.

I have 2 WEEKS until I am COMPLETELY done with my undergrad. That seems so insane to me. I've been counting down to this for the last like year and a half, and now it's finally here. It doesn't seem real. I don't feel like the semester is over. It went REALLY fast. I feel like it just started, yet everyone keeps asking me what I'm going to do in a few weeks. How am I almost a college graduate?

I've been thinking a lot about the last few years. A few moments really stand out, including the moment I first realized I was in the right program. The boys seem to stick out a lot too. Looking back, it doesn't seem like it's been 3 and a half years. Does everyone feel this way when the graduate?

I was listening to my iPod this morning while I was getting ready and this song by Lorde came on. It really hit me. It is scary getting old.

*Rae

Taking a Prismatic View on Life

After 85 days of anxiously waiting, it came yesterday! Wait, what came yesterday? PRISM came yesterday!!!!! It really shouldn't be a surprise if you follow my Twitter that I'm a huge Katy Perry fan (I actually prefer the term Katycat, but whatevs) so I was super excited for this album. Her last official album Teenage Dream was released over 3 years ago. Granted "Part of Me" and "Wide Awake" happened a year and a half ago, but still. It was time for new music.

I'm probably a little biased when I say the album is great, but honestly, it was exactly what I was waiting/hoping for. A lot has changed for my favorite pop star in the 3 years since her last album. She's grown up and matured and it shows in her song writing. The 16-track deluxe edition of PRISM is all about self-reflection, light and love. There are more love songs on this one than the previous albums, which is great. The fun dance party/Friday night songs are still there in "Birthday" and "This is How We Do" but a more grown-up Katy surfaces in the latter half of the album. Songs like "Love Me" and "By the Grace of God" show just how far she has come. Her vocals have improved along with her personal growth, which is always great to hear. I love all (okay expect "Dark Horse") of the songs on this album for different reasons, but I have a top 3 right now.

International Smile: Is there a way to get this song to play when I walk into a room? This is my new theme song. Written about her best friend DJ Mia Moretti, the song describes a powerful women who isn't afraid to go after what she wants. I want to be like that.

Love Me

Love Me: One of the self-reflection songs. It's all about learning to love yourself before you can let someone else love you. This song spoke to me when I first heard it and continues to give me strength. I love how music can do that.YouTube has failed to produce a decent audio video of this, so you have to link to Grooveshark, but it's worth the click.

Choose Your Battles: As of now, this is my favorite. It closes out the deluxe version. Like "Love Me" listening to this song felt like Katy had gotten into my head and wrote about my thoughts. The first time I heard the last minute, I got chills. Life relevant much? I love that this song is about deciding what to fight for. Sometimes you have to pick your battles because you won't win everything. Sometimes you want to fight to make something work, but the other person has already given up and you just kind of have to put your hands up and say "it's up to you. I'm done trying if you're not going to." 

There are several other songs that I really enjoy. "Walking on Air" is fun to dance to, and I want to play "Double Rainbow" at my wedding. "By the Grace of God" makes me emotional. Overall, this album is great, and I'm not just saying that because I'm a Katycat. I highly recommend checking it out, even if it's just on YouTube (make sure you get quality vids though.) It's one of the best 4th quarter offerings of 2013.

Time's Flying

Someone please tell me you woke up Green Day this morning?

When did it become October 1st? Where did September go? Better yet, where did all of summer go? I feel like time is going WAY to fast lately. It feels like summer just started, but now it's over and Fall is officially here (which is okay because I really like October and corn mazes and pumpkin cookies and Hocus Pocus) I've been at Winegars for 4 months now. I'll be done with my undergrad in 10 weeks. Like how is that even possible? It feels like I just started!

I'm doing all the things I want to for the most part. Class, work, hanging out with friends, but it still feels like I'm running out of time to do those things. December is going to be here before I know it and then I'm going to have to find a real job that may make me move away from my friends and family. That's scary.

If anyone knows how to make time slow down just a little bit, let me know!

Monday Blues?

If my Facebook and Twitter feeds are anything to go by, no one likes Mondays. They are rough, It was hard for me to wake up today too. My bed is way too warm and comfy compared to the harsh reality of an 8:30 class. Thankfully, I had a bit of an incentive in the form of a new song.

Katy Perry's new album "Prism" comes out in 22 days (not that I'm counting or anything). Along with releasing the lead single "Roar" she has released a couple promo singles. The point of these songs is just to tease the album. They aren't necessarily supposed to get radio time, though if they do I'm sure none of her team will cry. They are just meant to show what is to come. The first of the two was called "Dark Horse." It is VERY different from anything Katy has done before. I get some major "ET" vibes from it, but it really isn't the same. Rapper Juicy J guests on it, giving the already trap beat and even bigger hip hop influence. It's a good song and I like it, but I don't love it.

My love is reserved for the second promo single. "Walking on Air." Pulling on 90's dance hits and a little bit of the EDM vibe, "Walking on Air" should have been the lead single. The undercurrent love theme is classic Katy. When I first heard it last night it instantly put me in a better mood. I'd been listening to Death Cab for Cutie and some other slower stuff while I waited for "Walking on Air" to be released. The minute the first beats started, I smiled. It made me want to dance in bed. If you haven't heard it yet, check it out below. Go buy it. Sing it in the shower. Dance to it in the car. I'm right there with you.

Thoughts About Today

It's been 12 years, but seeing the images from that day still make me sad. Last night I was going through my old blog (nostalgia) and I came across a post I wrote two years ago on the 10 year anniversary. I'd like to re-share it. The thoughts I had then are still applicable now. May those who lost their lives that day, and those who have worked to protect our country, be forever remembered.

10 years ago I was 9. I was a 4th grader who didn't really pay attention to what was going on in the world. If it wasn't happening to me directly in my little bubble of elementary school, I didn't have a clue. Days revolved around friends and TV. Music and homework pages. I probably couldn't have told you a single thing happening in the "real" world, and to be honest, I didn't care. I didn't understand what tragedy was or what hatred meant. I was pretty much a typical kid.

And then it happened. That morning-I'll never forget where I was. My alarm when off at like 7:30, telling me it was time for yet another in my unair-conditioned school. But it was a different day. Instead of music or stupid commentary about the latest move, Todd and Erin, the DJ's on B98, were serious. The sound of their voice-it was like they were trying not to cry as they reported that two planes had hit the towers in New York. I didn't know what the towers were, but I knew things were bad. I rushed to turn on the TV to see the image we all know so well now.

Smoke rising out of the towers into the blue sky. I didn't really understand what was happening or what it meant, but it made me sad. I ran up the stairs to tell my mom, but she already knew. She was sitting on the couch with a stunned look on her face, like she coudn't believe what had happened.

School was interesting that day. I remember going to class and talking about what had happened. Everyone was so on edge-as they probably should have been. My teacher, Mrs. Lowe, asked us to write a journal entry about what pandemonium was. I didn't even know what the word meant. I wish I still had the journal, but I remember writing something about it meaning craziness like what was happening in New York, since that's what we had been talking about, while all the while fighting the image of a panda dancing around my head.

After school, I went home and watched all of the images of people coming out of the wreckage on the news. It was so over-whelming and I remembering being sad. The radio played every patriotic song they could find, including "I'm Proud to be an American." Hearing that song while sitting in front of the TV and seeing all the mess, I got goosebumps. To this day I can't listen to that song without getting chills and a little misty eyed.

On that day, for the first time I can remember, America stood totally united. Everyone was affected, whether they knew someone in New York or not. I personally didn't know anyone that was in the towers, but I heard stories and had classmates who's parents were supposed to be there, or be on one of those planes, but didn't go because of one thing or another. I constantly struggle with the idea of religion and where I stand with it, but I know that God was there, with all of those people, and everyone at home across America, protecting and holding them so that they could be strong.

And here we are 10 years later. What have we learned from 9-11? We still have hatred. Sometimes I think it's gotten even worse in the last few years. Our soldiers are still in Iraq. Politics is such a mess, I don't even want to imagine some of the candidates running our country. So why is it that one major event can unite a country so strongly yet the aftershocks of said event can pull us apart? Aren't we all Americans, fighting for the same rights we were promised: Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness?

Life is not simple, but it shouldn't be taken for granted. We have to wake up every single day and remember that we are so BLESSED to be ALIVE! Everyday is a gift, no matter what is going on. We need to remember that there are people out there DYING so we can live. It's an interesting paradox, isn't it?

Sometimes war is necessary and I support our troops even though I don't always agree with the cause for battle. I hope that one day, my children will be able to live in a world without hatred, bigotry, and evil. Maybe we can learn from our past and become better people because of it.

Whatever happens, wherever I may end up in this life, I know that I will never forget September 11th.

Words by Rae

I think I was 11 the first time I thought of being a writer. I’d written a horribly horrible (in terms of writing/style not content) short novel and thought it was fun. I still have the sixty notebook pages. I keep them to remind myself that I can never be as bad of a writer as I was then.  The short little novel was passed around the girls in my fifth grade class who apparently liked the love story between Kate and Sam. I thrived on the feedback. Their positive endorsements made me think that maybe, just maybe, I had what it took to write full time. I had this idealistic vision that I would live in a tiny house built sometime in the early 1900’s. The attic would be my writing space where I would craft excellent novels that everyone would fawn over. At 11, it seemed like a perfect existence.

Fast forward 10 years and while part of me still wants that house, I’m realizing being an author might not be in my game plan. Obviously it won’t pay the mortgage on that quant house, it also doesn’t seem possible. I’ve written and finished 6 or so novels and tried to publish two of them. I was rejected with both projects. During my first week of class this semester, some of my professors explained that in the PR business sometimes we have to make things happen for ourselves. It’s an idea that I’ve always been aware of, but hearing it again made me think.

The idea of publishing has never really left me, even though I’ve picked a different career path. The traditional way obviously didn’t work out for me. I’ve considered self-publishing on Amazon and Barnes and Noble, but it’s a long process. The 11 year-old is still alive in me. I never wanted to write for the money. I wrote because I had stories inside me that I wanted to share. The positive feedback from my readers pushed me to write more. I write because I like to share the stories inside my head (even though sharing a project for the first time absolutely terrifies me.)

I know that blogs can be a powerful resource. They are a free and easy way to spread information to people all over the world. I may not be able to run a mile, but I sure as heck can run a blog. The combination of all of this led me to one of the best ideas I’ve had in a while. Why not create a blog where I can post all of my writing? Hence the creation of www.wordsbyrae.tumblr.com

I chose Tumblr mainly because of the tags feature. I know blogger has one as well, but Tumblr’s makes more sense to me. I’ve seen other people post their writing on the website and have seen the positive reception it has received. So far I only have my latest Camp Nano effort Restart up as well as The Summer of Luke (some of you may have read it when I had it up on Figment.) I’m hoping to be able to post my new things as I finish them, but that’s much easier said than done. Either way, I just want to share. That’s why I started writing in the first place. If you check it out, great. If not, well at least you know it’s there. If you have a Tumblr, message me and let me know what you think of the pieces. You can always message me here too.

Rae

My Last First Day EVER!

Somehow it's here. I have no idea where my summer disappeared to (work comes to mind, though). It feels like I just barely moved out of Logan, yet here I am, sitting in my same apartment, at my same desk, working on my same blog. It doesn't really feel like the first day of school, but more like a continuation of last year. I only had one class this morning and it lasted fifteen minutes, which doesn't help me get in the school mode.

It's a little strange to think that this is my last first day of school. I mean, after 16 years, this is all I know. That scares me. As my friends put into perspective for me Friday night, in 15 weeks my college career will be over. I'm not sure if I know how to not go to school. January will definitely be weird.

In a way, being almost done with school is really exciting. I've worked so hard to get to this point. Graduating a semester early doesn't seem like a lot, but I'm actually really proud of myself. Despite my fears, I think I might be ready to enter the real world. I've been looking into jobs and I know there is a lot for me out there. As bittersweet as this all is, I'm looking forward to finishing this semester.

As has been tradition for the last 15 years, I present you my first day of school outfit.

Shirt and Jeans: Forever 21

Shoes: H&M

Jewelry: Park Lane

Good luck today everyone. Remember it's only the first day!

*Rae

Summer Bucket List

Where is the time going? It's really hard to believe that it is already May! Another two semesters are behind me. Just one more-senior semester- and I'll be done. That's really hard to adjust to.

I usually write a post about how rough the semester was (and it was. 18 credits+part-time job+ internship =busy) but I don't want to do that right now. As of now, this is the first summer I haven't worked since I was 16. That's a weird feeling. I'm not sure if I like it, but I should maybe try to enjoy it, right? If I'm not going to be working every night, I should have some fun. My two besties are here and we always have a good time when we're together. With so much time on my hands, I decided to make a bucket list.

Summer 2013 Bucket List

1. Publish "Summer of Luke" 

2. Read LOTS

3. Finish my April Camp Nanowrimo novel

4. Get a tan

5. Go to Pineview with friends

6. Join the rest of America and watch "Psycho"

7. Not spend crazy amounts of money

8. Discover and fall in love with new music (which could be problematic for #7)

9. Exercise every day

10. Find a job

What are your summer plans? Any I should add to my list?

How Can You Not Feel Something?

It's not really a secret that I'm a music junkie. I love the stuff and if I could, I would spend ALL my money on iTunes. Listening to albums with a pair of great headphones is amazing, but seeing a live performance is an experience of it's own.

Last night I had the opportunity to go to one of the best performances I've ever experienced. Every year my school hosts an end of year concert to celebrate the end of Spring semester. I went my freshman year and was pretty disappointed with Sean Kingston. This year the line up looked a bit more promising. USU was able to bring He Is We, The Ready Set, and Parachute to campus. I'm not a major fan of any of them, but I wasn't going to turn down a free concert. My friends, on the other hand, LOVE He Is We and Parachute, so I invited them to come with me. Concerts are always more fun with friends anyways.

Pre-Concert with Candalynne, Ashton, and Jayna in the adorable He Is We shirts Jayna made

He Is We and The Ready Set were okay, but Parachute blew my mind! They were high energy and seemed genuinely happy to be on the stage. I loved their performance and was so glad they closed the show! Singing and dancing along with my friends and most of the crowd made me happier than I've been in a long time.  Research says that when you hear a great song or your favorite part of a song, the same hormones that get released during sex surge through your brain, which is why it can make you feel so happy and relaxed. I feel like it might be stronger for me because I love music so much. For me a great performance gets me high, though I have nothing to compare it to. Drugs scare me. I feel weightless, invincible, like every part of my body is buzzing in the best possible way. I have yet to find anything else that makes me feel like this.

Everyone enjoys music differently and I get that, but some of the crowd last night boggled my brain. There were people around me that no matter how upbeat, fast, or energized the song was DID NOT MOVE!! I'm not talking about not dancing, I literally mean they did not move. Not a head bob, foot tap, or even a smile and I just don't get it! Music has been proven to help heal and relax, which is why music is used in therapy. So how is it possible that these people looked so unhappy to be at a great show?

What are your thoughts? How does music make you feel?

Coachella

There are two weekends in the music world that make my heart undeniably happy. The Grammy's and Coachella. Lucky for me, Coachella was this past weekend. Being the financially challenged college student I am, I wasn't able to go to Indio, California, but you best believe I lived on the YouTube livestreams. Without a doubt, I fell back in love with music over Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.

So what is Coachella? It's a 3 day music festival held in the Californian desert. There are numerous stages set up on a polo field and bands from all over and a couple DJ's go and play sets. I've talked to people who have gone and they say it is definitely an experience. There's a good mix of music and of course people to watch. It's been compared to the modern version of Woodstock. From what I could tell, the drugs were def there too. (We're looking at you Karen O)

This year the livestream line up was pretty solid. Metric, Tegan and Sara, Passion Pit, Phoenix, Two Door Cinema Club....and so many others. I'm pretty sure my computer almost had a meltdown from overuse. I had the shows I was not going to miss picked out, but I also decided to check out some new bands just to see what they were like. It was worth it (to my music loving soul, not my bank account.) I discovered a few new bands (Purity Ring, The Postal Service) and many new songs. 

The best part of music is the ability to share it. Here's my Coachella playlist.

Metric "Gimme Sympathy": This was the first set I watched and they KILLED it! Emily Haines, the lead singer, is a little firecracker. I have never seen them play before, but I look forward to getting the chance. I've heard a couple of their songs, but this is by far my favorite.

Passion Pit "It's Not My Fault I'm Happy." This band has always just kind of been there. I've listened to some of their songs, but haven't really been a huge fan. Their set was after Metric, so I decided to watch. There's something about the truth of this song that really speaks to me for some reason.

Purity Ring "Fineshrine". Until Friday night, I had never listened to Purity Ring. Their name had been tossed around a little in some of the Indie Music things I follow, but I hadn't heard their music. I originally planned on watching the "Yeah Yeah Yeahs" who played at the same time. One song in and I was done with Karen O, but still wanted to watch livestream, so I flipped to Purity Ring. I AM SO GLAD I DID!. The group is just two people, but they are amazing. Megan, the lead singer, seemed so excited to be there and honestly grateful to be playing, which is always nice to see. This is my favorite song from them right now.

Tegan and Sara "I'm Not Your Hero." They opened their set with this song, which made me happy because it's my favorite. I wouldn't say they are the best live, but they make up in enthusiasm what they lack in live vocal skill.

The Postal Service "Such Great Heights." Every now and then The Postal Service will show up on my Pandora station, but I never really thought much of them. I decided to watch their show Saturday night. They are one of the few bands that actually sound just as good live as they do on their album. Ben Gibbard showed off his musical talents by playing guitar, keyboard, and drums during the performance. The girls in the band also had really cute shoes.

Phoenix "Rome." I first heard this French band during my freshman year. My roommate and I loved "Listomania" and every time I hear it, I think of spring and finals week (but the good aspects of it.) The coolest thing about the Phoenix set (no not the R. Kelly "Ignition" remix. That was just weird) was that lead singer got up close and personal with the fans. He was on and off that stage and crowd surfing like his life depended on it and the crowd loved it.

Two Door Cinema Club "What You Know." There were a lot of great bands and performances at Coachella, but by far the best was Two Door Cinema Club. These little Irish boys know how to perform. Their set was at midnight my time, but they jumped and danced across the stage, amping up the energy level. They were nerdy cute too, which didn't hurt.

One day I'm going to make it to the festival. Until then though, I'll rely on technology to get me there.

The 5 Year Plan

Do you know what's absolutely terrifying? Realizing your 5 year plan is almost up. Can you say quarter-life crisis??

If my Twitter and Facebook feeds are any sort of indication, I know I'm not the only one going through this. But it's terrifying. You see, I don't really know what to do. My last 5 year plan was pretty simple. I drafted it my junior year of high school when everyone was telling me to start thinking about my future. It wasn't really a big deal for me then. I had been thinking about my future FOREVER! I didn't really have many choices, since my parents had mapped out a pretty decent education plan for me. The original 5 year plan looked something like this.

*Go to college and graduate my teaching degree
*Go on LOTS of dates
*Get a reliable car-if you ever saw/rode in Daisy, you understand
*Work to pay for the things I need and want

It was basic, but at 17, I really didn't understand what being in the "real world" was like. But now those five years are up and I have to create a new plan. I found out some exciting possible news concerning my graduation, and it's making me realize just how close to being done with school I am. So where do I go from here? Obviously I still have to finish this semester and next, but then what? There are so many unknowns. Here's the start of the next 5 year plan.

*Get a PR job with a stable company
*BUY a house. An apartment will be fine at first, but I want a house that I can paint and decorate
*Find HIM
*Get a new, grown up looking car
*Get a pure white, fluffy kitten and name her "Cupcake" (this is probably the easiest of everything on this list)

I feel like these things have always been on the plan, but now instead of being those things I'll do "when I grow up" they're the things I have to start doing NOW!

So what about you? Do you have a 5 year plan? Have you thought about what you'll do once you leave the cushion of academia? I want to hear your thoughts.

Spring Break

Last week was my last Spring Break....EVER!! That's so scary to think. Graduation is getting closer and closer. December will be here before I know it. I've never had the "College Spring Break Experience," mainly because of money. The last two years I've gone back to my parent's house and worked at the bowling ally. This year, I still went home, but I didn't work...I PLAYED!!!

Anytime my two besties and I get together, we have fun. Being Spring Break and actually having decent weather, last week was no exception. To make it even better, it was BOTH of their 21st birthdays, so we had even more reason to celebrate. In standard Rachael fashion, it was photo-documented!

The week started with a Friday night trip to Denny's (it's our place) There was a cute boy sitting in the booth behind us. I smiled at him and when they left, they dropped this paper flower on the table in front of me. A phone number was written on the stem, so I text it. He was 16!! Good to know a cougar career is a possibility.

                                               

Tuesday we decided to go thrifting at the Layton DI (insert Macklemore lyrics here). If anyone can tell me what this is, I'll make you cupcakes.

After thrifting dinner. Awww, Taco Bell, you make me laugh. Not my idea of romance, but if it works....

Friday was Candalynne's Birthday and that meant presents and dinner! Oh and tons of laughs!

We went to see "Safe Haven" (great movie!) at the Junction and then walked across the street. Cute little place, but apparently the cupcake wasn't that great.

Saturday was Jayna's Birthday Party! The theme was supposed to be "The Most Popular Girl in School" a web series she loves, but the hats made it impossible for our inner unicorns to not be embraced.

Team Deandra notebook I made for her.

And pens and dinosaur erasers. Did I mention Jay LOVES dinos???

The "Deandra" cake Jay made! 

Overall, it was a great week! I'm so glad I have friends who know how to have fun without spending tons of money. This was hands down the best Spring Break ever!

Life is Like...

The other day I was playing Solitaire at work (judge me all you want. I needed a break from thinking about school.) I was like 0 for 20, with the computer telling me I was out of moves each time. It didn't matter what I did, I could NOT win! And then it hit me. Life is like a game of Solitaire. Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose. We can start the game over and try to correct our mistakes, but that rarely helps and if you're like me, you usually end up making the same mistakes.  Sometimes you just have to accept defeat and start a new game and try to learn from the mistakes you made the last time. Essentially it's not about how many games you actually win, it's about realizing when it's time to start over and learning from your mistakes. Eventually you will win!

Here's to starting a new game!

One of Those Weeks

Have you ever had one of those weeks where you wished it was over on Monday? That's been this week. So many things have happened, sending my stress levels through the roof. The funny thing is, we've been talking about stress in my Health Psychology class. Poster child? I think so.

I find it really easy to get down when weeks like this happen. Music has always been my comfort. A good song and decent cry can usually fix most things, but this week has tested that theory. It held up, but barely. When the music wasn't cutting it, words did. I really like quotes (I never do anything with them, but I love them nonetheless) and have spent a considerable amount of time searching through the Tumblr "quotes" tag. Here are some of my favorites from the week.

 Just remember everything can be overcome, it might just take some tears, carbs, and angry music. Have a good weekend everyone!

Irony

The iTunes "Single of the Week" is usually a highlight for me. I've found some really cool artists and let's be honest, who doesn't love free music? The people at iTunes that determine which songs go up usually like to stick with a theme. During Christmas, all the free songs were about the season. I expected this week's single to be love songs, being Valentine's Day and all. But the "Single of the Week" guy has a sense of humor. This week's featured song is called "Restless Heart" by Matt Hires. Take a listen. It's not exactly a song I would play for my Valentine (if I had one.) It's still available for free on iTunes under the "Single of the Week" tab.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Go out and do good things!

Are We Finally Getting Better?

The Grammy's are this weekend, and I'm super excited. Not only am I looking forward to seeing what new song different artists decide to debut, but the dresses and overall fashion are a great part. This year things are probably going to be a little different. I've been watching and paying attention to awards season for a long time, and I don't remember anything like this happening. So what happened?

CBS, the network airing the awards this year, decided they wanted to avoid any fines because of wardrobe malfunctions or issues. To do this, they sent out an email to anyone involved with the Grammy's advising the talent to keep their outfits television appropriate. The letter detailed that butts and boobs were NOT to be displayed and that side-boob could be problematic. Anyone wishing to appear on television must adhere to these standards. From a PR standpoint, I'd double and triple check my client's outfit to make sure they wouldn't even be questioned. Red Carpet interviews are publicity that you would have to be brain-dead to pass up!

I think it's really cool that CBS sent out that email. The entertainment world gets a wrap for not having moral quality, and while some artists seem more interested in the slut appeal than talent, I think there are several who actually have values and show that in their fashion choices. Unfortunately, those people are often overlooked. Maybe this new dress code mandate will encourage the rest of America to cover up. I'm sick of seeing people in clothes that are two and three sizes too small for them. I hate that girls feel the need to dress like a skank just to attract guys. Maybe if the role models and the people the media tells us we need to look/be like start dressing appropriately, everyone else will follow suit.

Now I'm not saying that we should dress like pioneers. I have a pair of short shorts that I love (and can't wait to wear again!) but I understand that there is a time and place for them. I would never wear them to any type of ceremony. Fashion is all about appropriateness. If you're going to go the Grammy's, dress for it! It could be a very important night.

Needless to say, I will be watching (and live tweeting) Sunday night. I'm excited to see how this new rule will influence the fashion and even more interested in what the artists have to say about it.

Blocked

It feels like forever since I last blogged. I know it really hasn't been that long, but when you're used to blogging 3 times a week, going 2 weeks without a post is a lifetime. It's not like I didn't have time or a way to get onto the internet, because I did. I just didn't feel like I had anything to say. This problem has translated not just into my blogging but my schoolwork and personal writing as well. I don't know how to start any of my essays or writing projects and get frustrated and give up. Is that my destiny? I can still edit like a boss (sorry ego moment), but pulling my wisdom teeth out would probably be easier than writing my own stuff.

Writer's block isn't the only thing going on. I'm pretty sure I've hit my academic wall. Any and all motivation to work on class items is gone, leading me to stress. For the first time in my academic career, I don't care what grade I get in my classes, as long as I pass and get the credit. I'm starting to realize college GPA isn't nearly as important as my high school one was.

So what's a writer, who can't write, to do? I found solace in stupid videos and cat pictures like a fat kid would in food. The best gem of the last two weeks appeared on my tumblr last night.

The caption is what makes this the best. Sometimes I feel like all we need in this crazy life is a soft blanket and a kitten (and maybe a little bit of chocolate).

So maybe I'm not supposed to be a writer. Maybe I'm just in a rut. Maybe the weather has me down. I honestly don't know, but I'm completely open to suggestions on how to beat it.

Have a good Thursday everyone.

Rae

Falk

I've had a few people ask me who I'm doing my internship for, so I'd like to take this Music Friday to introduce them. They are a country group named Falk. They are sisters from Logan who are currently recording their first album in Nashville. Both Natalee and Alexa write, sing lead, and play lead guitar. Through their music, they have become ambassadors for the National Eating Disorder Awareness (NEDA) campaign and have shared their story and song "Deadly Beauty" at walks across the country. Their message is one of love and loving yourself.

While they are currently recording their album, the girls are also trying to get on The Ellen Degeneres Show. Ellen has always believed and shared self-love and acceptance. If you like the song, you should go to http://www.facebook.com/events/200082940116196/ and help Falk get on Ellen!

I think I've decided what I'm going to do with this blog. I'm just going to update whenever I feel like it. Share the things I want the world to know, when I want them to become known. May be 3 times a week, may not be. Things are just getting crazy right now, especially since my computer hard drive decided to have a meltdown today and I am laptopless for the next 2 weeks. We'll see if I'm still alive by then, or if the insanity known as college has gotten the best of me.

Happy Friday Everyone!

And Now It's Wednesday

As part of my 21st Birthday Weekend, I went shopping over the long weekend. My main focus was business clothes, which I was able to find several options (thank you H&M). When I was standing in the dressing room, with the amazing runway lighting scheme, I felt like a grown up for the first time. Looking at my reflection in the mirror, dressed in a grey business suit, I realized just how excited I am to get a PR job. I know the clothes don't make the job completely, but they certainly don't hurt! I've been wearing blazers and jeans to class lately, yet I feel so overdressed among the jeans and sweatshirts. I know the weather is limiting everyone's fashion choices (I bought 2 really cute dresses this weekend, but it doesn't look like I'm going to be wearing them anytime soon.) Does anyone else feel like this? How do you battle the wintertime fashion blues?

I'm not sure how much longer I'm going to be able to keep this blog up. As you can see, I've been missing days a lot. My ideas of blog-worthy topics are completely gone. I'm blaming my writer's block for this, just FYI.  Everything I've come up with lately is very personal "this is what I learned today" type things. Does anyone actually want to read that? I really do like this blog because it's forcing me to write, something I've not been able to find time for lately. So we'll see. If I don't see you guys for a while, thanks for reading! It really has meant a lot to me.

Rachael

Breathe In

This week has been absolutely insane! Not only is it Birthday Week, but I found something I really wanted and actually got it. An email for an internship came through at the end of last week. I wasn't planning on doing one this semester, set on tackling an internship during my summer. It isn't really a secret that I want to be a music publicist when I graduate and this internship is doing PR work for a country group called Falk. This week, I organized my portfolio, interviewed, and GOT THE INTERNSHIP!! I'm super excited and think it will be a good experience. The group is just starting out, so in a way I get to shape their PR efforts and build from the ground up!

Life feels like it's starting to happen. Not only am I almost 21, but my future career is right at my finger tips. I need to take a minute and just breathe it all in. I'm very excited and I feel like this song sums up that feeling. It's called "Breathe In" by a woman named Frou Frou. I discovered the song on Tumblr last week and have fallen in love with it. To me, it's one of those songs that would be played at the end of a movie when the couple gets together. I could also definitely see it in a wedding video. Sometimes when things are going so fast and spinning around us, we have to remember to take a minute and just breathe in and enjoy the moment. Happy Weekend Everyone!

The Next Step

When I was a freshman, the word "internship" was tossed around casually. It was that thing I knew I would be doing later. Sophomore year it was a bit more prevalent,  mainly because I was actually taking classes for my major. My internship would be completed in the summer before my senior year. Everything else was fuzzy. Then things shifted. I realized I could graduate in December instead of May, making my senior year span a calender year, not a school year. My plan to complete my internship over the summer was still in place, but I started to feel like I was missing out on something after listening to my friends and classmates talk about their internship's and work experiences.

"Never say never" as Justin Bieber would say. The other night an email came through for an internship that almost seemed to good to be true. I thought about it overnight and decided that I should apply. This internship is a music PR one, which is exactly what I want to do when I move out of Frozen Logan. I had never applied for an internship before. It's kind of a scary thing and I relied on my PR friends a lot to tell me what I needed to do. I've come up with a few tips for applying for internships, and I guess they could even be applied to job interviews.

You Can Do This! Tips to Feel Successful in an Interview:
1. Believe in yourself! Confidence (not cockiness) can go a LONG way. If you believe you have the skills/abilities to do the job, others will too.
2. Pick the right outfit. Whether it's a skirt or pants, make sure that you feel comfortable in your choice. If you're uncomfortable, it will be noticeable. Shoes are included in this. Take into consideration how far you'll have to walk.
2.5. Dress to impress. First impressions stick. Make sure you look right for the job.
3. Organize ALL of the important materials you will need. Nothing says unprepared like a jumbled stack of papers.
4. Make sure you can open whatever method of organization you've chosen. I failed at this. I bought a folder yesterday to put my portfolio in. Took it home and tried to open the binding to insert more page protectors. The binding wouldn't budge. A screwdriver, penny, knife, and my roommate later, I ended up going back to the store I bought it from and had to have them help me open it. It took 3 of us.
5. Take a copy of your resume and portfolio. Just because you emailed it to them doesn't mean they looked at it. It's always nice to have something they can see right there.
6. Smile and be you! They're going to ask you questions, so answer them honestly. You want to look your best, but lying will come back to bite you later.
7. Say "thank you" when you leave.
8. Afterward, don't stress. If things are meant to happen, they will.

My internship interview was this afternoon and I feel like it went really well. I'll find out if I got it on Friday. I'm trying not to worry about it too much. School is sucking me in so hard right now. There's plenty to keep me occupied. If I get it, I'm going to celebrate this weekend. If I don't, I'm going to go out and party like I'm turning 21. I believe that whatever is meant to happen, will, and I just have to accept it and try to do my best.

So This Is Growing Up?

Birthday week has officially begun! While I am super excited for this weekend and the celebrations I have planned for the big 2-1, I'm also a little sad. I'm officially loosing my youth. Come Sunday afternoon, I will no longer be a child. Blaming my mistakes, immature moments, and incidents of irresponsibility on my adolescence will no longer be acceptable. It's funny that I'm slightly dreading this life event, because just a few years ago I couldn't wait for it. But that always happens, doesn't it? I think I might be ready for it though. Based on some things that have happened recently, it seems like some really good things are about to come.

I think the fact that I'm actually growing up is really hitting hard. I'm in the last downhill of my college career. Real world jobs will have to be found, bringing along adult responsibilities  Big Girl clothes are the only perks to growing up. Business attire is so fun!

I invite you to mourn my youth with me. Cupcake points to anyone who can name all of the following!

Answers: Arthur, Madeline, Nickoldeon's Face, NSync (Justin's new song just dropped. Still deciding if I like it or not), Polywog from Gulla Gulla Island.

Big Jet Plane

Do you know what the absolute best thing in the world is? Okay, so I lot of things come to mind. One of my favorite things to do in this universe involves music (no duh!) You turn all the lights off, crawl into bed, pull the covers close around you, and put your headphones in. Just laying in the dark with the music....I can't explain how much I love this! I think part of it is that I can enjoy the musicality of the songs better. All my other sense are cut off, letting me just listen. I'm not distracted by what's going on, because it's dark and I'm alone, so nothing can happen. It's my favorite way to end a stressful day.

Some songs are better for doing this than others. I usually pick mellow songs like Sia, John Mayer, and artists like them. Essentially, I'm trying to decompress from the day. The last thing I need is major guitar riffs and drum solos. The only bad thing, is if I find a song that I really love. I probably won't want to turn it off and then I never sleep. Sometimes there's a song that makes me just want to create. I can't explain the urge, but every now and then I'll watch/see/read something and I just get this super powerful need to create something. It would be great if I didn't have writers block.

Today's Music Friday song is one of those songs. I discovered it last night and have probably played it over 100 times already. The lyrics aren't groundbreaking and I'm pretty sure they stick to the same 3 chords the whole time (I could be wrong though, I don't play guitar.) This song kind of spoke to me though. The song is about wanting to protect someone and take them away from a bad situation or something they don't like. I can't wait until I find someone willing to do that for me. It's called "Big Jet Plane" by Angus and Julia Stone. If you have any songs you think I should listen to, let me know. I'm looking to update my iTunes library. Happy Friday Everyone!

Where Am I Supposed to Be Again?

Does anyone else NOT feel like their classes are part of their schedule yet? I know we're only 3 days into the semester, but I don't feel like the courses I'm taking are mine. Like, I keep thinking I need to do something for Media Law and I caught myself looking for my Grammar textbook to work on homework. The fact that I don't have any of my textbooks yet might have something to do with that. But still. 

As I said yesterday, some of my classes are more exciting than others, but none of them feel right yet. I still feel like I'm on vacation. It's not a good feeling. I know it's going to take some time, but I need routine! Though, sleeping until 10 because I don't have class until 1 wasn't horrible. 

How do you get back into the swing of things at the start of the semester? Anyone ready to give up yet? Was there a hottie you can't wait to talk to in the class of 200? I want to hear your 1st week of class stories!

In the mean time, here's some college thoughts brought to you by Tumblr. 

New Beginings

I'm am doing so bad at this lately! First sickness and then trying to figure out my schedule, I swear I'm going to keep blogging regularly! I even had a post written up yesterday, but then the internet freaked out and I didn't get a chance to post it. 

I hope everyone is having a great semester so far! Yesterday morning I was super optimistic about my new classes and this semester. Last night, I wasn't feeling the same way. Film is just about the only class I was excited about after going to. McCuskey is the professor and I feel like he is going to make this semester great! It's a big class too, but we're talking about things I know. MOVIES! Not to mention this class is right in the middle of awards season. Should be interesting!

Health Psychology and PR Research don't excite me as much. PR Research only has 13 people in it, most of whom have a reputation of not working very hard. From what I've heard about the class, I'm in for a very rough semester. Why am I taking 18 credits?? (Oh right, I don't want to go through another Logan winter.) I'm determined to succeed though. 

Thankfully my work classes seem pretty chill. I'm back in my library room that feels like home. Only one of my classes is an originate, which is nice too.

Is anyone else feeling stressed out by classes yet? I get this way at the start of every semester. I know I will be able to do it all and succeed, I just have to get my routine back. Routine is the key to surviving college. Once everything falls into a time slot, it can all get done.The bitter cold doesn't help with the stress, but today's warmer! 

Good luck with this semester everyone! If you were looking for a chance to change things, it's right here in front of you. All of the mistakes of last year-procrastination, boys, not giving it your all-it's all behind you. Go out there and show the world who's boss!